Bitter and Sweet, I Get It Now

The bitterness of sweetness, I get it now

Bitter and Sweet, I Get It Now

I get it now—

the bitterness and the sweetness of life.

For every smile,

there’s a tear waiting somewhere inside me,

quietly searching for the moment it can finally be free.

It knows joy and pain are both temporary.

Some ride the highs too long,

forgetting the lows that taught them how to hold on.

But the truth?

They’re always there.

Both joy and sorrow…

in plain sight.

I mean—why should tears hide,

when pain doesn’t owe us anything but a lesson?

This…

this is the true understanding of knowledge:

to taste the courage it takes

to say the words stuck at the tip of our lips.

Words like I’m sorry.

To know, even in the heat of battle,

some wars aren’t worth fighting.

To carry peace in your mind—

that is the true gold at the end of every rainbow.

The things we take for granted

are the very things someone, somewhere,

is praying for with their last breath.

Whispering about hills without limitations,

and the invisible chains we place on ourselves.

They’ll tell you…

these years come fast.

Time slips through your hands

like sand in the wind.

So don’t try to grip too tightly to the physical world.

Nothing you own comes with you.

The only thing that lasts—

is the memory of you.

The touch two hands share.

The kiss two lips feel.

The firelight, popping and crackling,

bearing witness to a love so simple,

so divine,

even nature would speak of it

if the trees could talk.

It’s understanding this:

you don’t need to be seen to live.

You already are the spotlight,

as the stars stare down in awe

while you stand there,

bathed in moonlight.

Like the sun reaching into the window,

touching the rim of the coffee cup—

there’s a reason coffee tastes sweetest in the morning.

It’s when love is near.

But bitter…

on the days when love is far.

Like the grays in my hair,

only visible when I stop long enough to stare into the mirror—

reminding me:

the world is changing.

I’m changing.

Love is changing.

Letting go is changing,

and becoming harder with every day I have left.

I walk to the window,

reach for the coffee,

close my eyes,

and take a sip.

The scent of fresh beans rises to my lips—

and I think of you.

The sweetness is like the wildflowers

that grow in the mountains

even after the fires.

There’s beauty in the burns.

There’s beauty in the pain.

Beauty in tears.

And beauty in your smile.

There is beauty in hello.

And beauty in goodbye.

But the most powerful beauty of all—

is the beauty of your spirit.

It leaves pieces of you behind

in the hearts of others,

reminding them what’s possible

when you let go…

and let love in.

I know—

because I let you in.

So even now,

as I smile…

I close my eyes

and feel the bitterness of life.

My mom,

my dad,

my brothers,

my sisters.

I ache for the time apart—

for the days we didn’t know were slipping by.

As kids, you never think

there will come a day

when we all go our separate ways.

The voices that raised me,

that I used to hear every day—

now only show up once in a while.

Like silence

next to the waves

ripping the waters.

Maybe this is what God truly meant—

that finding peace in life

starts with finding yourself.

But don’t ever forget this:

Life is bittersweet.